I can't watch pbs sober anymore
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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