Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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