hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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