ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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