If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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