hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
tell me about the eggs
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
