We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
