Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(517): View more from Michigan

and trust me i need no booty pop lessons

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(706): View more from Georgia

Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can

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(619): View more from California

Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(403): View more from Alberta, CA

But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.

(917): View more from New York City

Gotta love Minnesota

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(860): View more from Connecticut

don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you

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(937): View more from Ohio

That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.

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