Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
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