Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize