Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize