it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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