More tranny stories later!
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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