No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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