I think I just saw someone hide a body.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
