the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
