Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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