I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
