Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
