do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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