I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
