Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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