I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
