so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
