Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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