VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Randomize
