As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Randomize
