i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
