I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
