8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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