I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
