I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
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