yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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