It's a beautiful day for a hangover
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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