it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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