Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
we made out on top of his cat.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
