You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Randomize
