operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
