Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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