I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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