YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
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