so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
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