i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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