I bet he comes in French.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
