clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
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