you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
