check it out our google latitudes are spooning
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
