I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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