I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
It's never too late to be topless.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
