Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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