Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize